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Monday, 12 September 2011

Sinbad Week: Sinbad And The Minotaur (2011)


The other week, Sean Robson of Tales From The Flaming Faggot wrote a very amusing and damning review of the TV movie Sinbad And The Minotaur - making me reconsider my own plans to review the film as a potential source of Dungeons & Dragons inspiration.

In the end I decided that as I'd paid a few pounds for the DVD I really should watch it - and I'm glad I did because I believe Sean did it a slight disservice.

Sure it's not a patch on a Harryhausen Sinbad movie, but taken as a 'lost episode' of Xena: The Warrior Princess it's pretty decent entertainment with a "unique" take on the classic Minotaur and some other interesting monsters to challenge Sinbad and his crew on their hunt for the legendary golden head of the Colossus of Rhodes.

Crixus from Spartacus: Blood And Sand (aka Manu Bennett) initially seems an odd choice for the Arabian sea captain, but he quickly grew on me, and as Sean quite rightly pointed out Aussie cutie Holly Brisley is less than regal as Princess Tara, who accompanies our hero after he rescues her from the clutches of evil sorcerer Al-Jibar (Steven Grives).

Al-Jibar also seeks the priceless, Ancient Grecian, solid gold, giant head, and brings along  Seif (Jared Robinson), his flesh-eating ghoul creation, to further trouble the good captain and his crew of adventurers.

They quickly find the lost island where the golden head is hidden (Tara drops a single line that this has actually taken months and they've had adventures along the way, but there's no real indication that they didn't just sail straight there), only to encounter the strange, sullen natives who take them in (rather suspiciously).

Sinbad and crew rush off to the nearby volcano where they find an entrance to a labyrinth and discover that it is guarded by a monstrous "minotaur" - in this case a massive, scaly CGI bull with demon eyes and multiple horns.

Hot on their heels is Al-Jibar, who has been using his eagle familiar to spy on Sinbad, and then things get more complicated when the minotaur's roar causes the islanders to transform into zombie-like beastmen.

As sword and sorcery flicks go, Sinbad And The Minotaur is a swashbuckling romp, that doesn't take itself (and shouldn't be taken) too seriously - with the labyrinth itself being a pretty decent cinematic depiction of a section of a classic Dungeons & Dragons dungeon - complete with pit traps, portcullises, secret doors etc

It is a shame though that it has also been written as rather a vanilla Sinbad, with much of the Eastern promise and glamour of real Sinbad tales exorcised - he doesn't even pray to Allah (for fear of upsetting Middle America, no doubt); there's just some vague mumblings about anonymous "gods" - which can't offend anyone, I guess.

Put Harryhausen out of your mind for 90-odd minutes and focus more on the oeuvre of Xena and Hercules and you might actually find yourself enjoying Sinbad And The Minotaur for what it is, rather than hating it for what it isn't.

GAME MATERIAL:

Cloak Of Mists - To the casual glance this appears, when first found, to a tatty black cloak, sewn through with silver threads and lined with purple - of some quality, for sure, but nothing so special. However around the edge you will find a number of small, spherical buttons (there will be either 3d4+3 or three 'average dice', if the DM possesses such things).

If the cape is put on and one of the buttons removed (the buttons disintegrate when removed, so are essentially 'charges' for the device) the cloak and all those covered by it will become totally invisible for as long as the cloak is worn. It can cover one or two people normally, but can be held up as a "sheet", essentially shielding up to four persons behind it.

However, it has a secondary, more impressive purpose when in use, if the person who removed the button wills it. all those - and whatever they are carrying - cloaked by the magical garment can instantly teleport (as per the spell, Swords & Wizardry Complete Rulebook, page 71) to any location the person knows (with their chances of failure halved).

They will become visible when they arrive in their new destination and that charge will be spent.

Once all the buttons have been removed and the cloak used for a final time it will turn to dust and scatter in the wind.


The Great Bull:

The twisted son of the Sun God, born of human woman, The Great Bull (sometimes erroneously referred to as a 'minotaur') is an enormous, spike, scale and fur coated beast that rampages around its underground labyrinth on an isolated island.

On the rare occasions it wishes to communicate with the humans on its island - who are all (secretly, somehow) its offspring, it can speak through its high priestess in the village where its children live (see below).

Full of rage and anger (it has abandonment issues), it really just wants to be left alone and is never happy when adventurers turn up looking for the giant golden Colossus head it has been left to guard.

Its preferred meal is the flesh and blood of the pampered classes - but not many nobles or royalty come to the island these days.

#ENC: Unique
Size: Large
Hit Dice: 12 + 8
AC: -1 [20]
Attacks: Trample (3d6+8); Gore (2d10+8); Bite (2d6+8)
Saving Throw: 3 (as a demi-god, it also has 75% magic resistance)
Special: Immune to non-magical weapons or magical weapons with a less than +2 bonus
Move: 15
Alignment: Chaos
Challenge Level/XP: 18/ 3,800

As well as its mighty armour class, magic resistance and immunity to most weapons, The Great Bull also regenerates 6 hit points a round - but only when it is not engaged in a physical activity, such as fighting. Knowing this, if The Great Bull finds itself getting worn down, it will make a tactical withdrawal so it can quickly heal before returning to the fray.

The Children Of The Bull:

The inhabitants of the single village on the island of the labyrinth, are sullen, hostile humans, ashen and forlorn. While antagonistic and hostile to any visitors they will not be violent, preferring to simply turn people away and send them back where they came from.

However, if they learn that a member of the group is of noble (or better) blood they will invite them to stay - with the intention of luring them to the labyrinth for The Great Bull (who they call All-Father) to feast upon.

Should The Great Bull be injured in some way, its mighty roar (which can be heard right across the island) sends its Children into fits of apoplexy and they slowly, painfully transform into horned zombies whose only desire is to protect their God and herd any other living souls on the island into the labyrinth.

Small horns grow out of their foreheads, causing blood  to run down their faces and black ichor trickles out the sides of their mouths as they take on a gruesome visage.

One of their number, the high priestess (who lives among the villagers as a humble tavern wench), can not only channel The Great Bull's thoughts (as above), but can also stave off her transformation until she wills it.

#ENC: 3d6+2
Size: Man-sized
HD: 1 (+4 when transformed)
AC: 7 [12]
Attacks: Weapon (+1)
Saving Throw: 16
Special: Once transformed they are immune to all mind control, sleep, charm etc as the magic of their God is coursing through their blood. They also become totally fearless.
Move: 12
Alignment: Neutral (Chaotic when transformed)
Challenge Level/XP: 2/30

Seif Al-Ghul aka The Undying:

A magical creation formed by the sorcerer Al-Jibar's blending of a human and a flesh-eating demon, Seif The Undying is six foot tall, pale-skinned warrior with strange facial tattoos and fanged teeth.

A master of weapons, he is Al-Jibar's bodyguard, feeding on the flesh of his kills to restore his strength.

Even if slain (as long as his head isn't removed), blood can be poured into his mouth to restore him to life (with 1d4 Hit Points), then he will crawl off to feed.

Dead flesh restores his hit points at a rate of 4 points per round of devouring, however if he takes a bite out of living flesh he instantly heals a number of hit points equal to the amount of damage he caused.

#ENC: Unique
Size: Man-sized
HD: 8 (HP: 50)
AC: 7 [12]
Attacks: Two weapon  strikes (scimitar - 1d8+2 or whip - 1d2+special*) or a single bite (1d6+2)
Saving Throw: 8
Special: Immune to pain, 50% magic resistance.
*Whip causes victim to roll under DEX+Level on 4d6 or trip over and fall flat on his face.
Move: 12
Alignment: Chaotic
Challenge Level/XP: 10/1,400

2 comments:

  1. Good post. Despite my edict against any future of these kind of sci/fi channel movies I will give this one a go for all the reasons you suggested. I haven't seen one of these in awhile and I am badly in need of such an goofy adventure.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Goofy adventure", that sums it up nicely. In fact that probably covers pretty near every movie I like ;) I look forward to hearing what you thought of this if you get a chance to see it.

    ReplyDelete

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