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Wednesday, 12 October 2011

D&DVD Of The Week: The Beastmaster (1982)


Growing up in pre-Internet days, Marc Singer was always "that guy from (the original) V" while the stunning Tanya Roberts was one of the last, true Charlie's Angels (and, almost certainly, my first red-haired crush).

Little did I realise at the time that they both had a whole 'nother life in the fantastic swords and sorcery flick The Beastmaster.

Singer is the barbarian Dar, born with the supernatural ability to communicate with animals and see through their eyes (if he concentrates hard enough), whose home village is razed by the Jun horde - a merciless army of killers working for Maax (Rip Torn), the high priest who has seized control of the land.

On the path to revenge, Dar - and his animal companions (a couple of ferrets, an eagle and a black-painted tiger seemingly masquerading as a panther) - meets up with 'slave girl' Kiri (Roberts), warrior Seth (John Amos) and a young boy called Tal (Josh Milrad), all seeking to free the land from Maax's cruel grip and restore Tal's father Zed (Rod Loomis) to the throne.

Along the way there's all sorts of hijinks with a variety of humanoid monsters (including a trio of hag-like witches working for Maax; leathery-winged beasties that envelop their victims in their wings and suck their skin, innards and muscles off; and the insane, rampaging death guards), plenty of fighting, some decent (for the '80s special effects) and a surprisingly complex plot (or maybe I was just distracted by Tanya Roberts).

The Beastmaster
even manages to throw in a couple of false endings, so that just when you think Maax has been beaten and all is right in the world, the Jun horde come riding back over the horizon and our heroes have more troubles on their hands.

And Dar is an interesting barbarian - although clearly inspired by Conan (as all barbarian movies were in the '80s), he isn't superhumanly strong, has a soft side (he cries when Zed calls him a coward and kicks him out of their gang - and at that stage he doesn't even know Zed is his true father) and clearly loves his animals (he won't leave the temple dungeons until he has found his ferrets).

Of course, it still has its odd moments - such as the scene where Dar and Seth rescue Kiri and some other girls from the priests who are taking them to be sacrificed. Our heroes only actually liberate Kiri and nothing is ever said or done about the other girls who were, presumably, eventually taken off to be sacrificed anyway!

And then, of course, there's the scene near the start where one of the hag-witches walks into the king's bedchamber at night with a cow - I'm calling "magic spell" on that one, though, otherwise it's too bizarre for words (especially given the wonderfully revolting sorcery that follows).

However, so well made and well paced - under the direction of co-writer Don Coscarelli (who also directed the four highly-regarded Phantasm movies and Bubba Ho-Tep) - that even at just under two hours duration, The Beastmaster never outstays its welcome.

GAME MATERIAL:


Death Guard

A rampaging form of undead creature that is created by torturing a man to the point of insanity, then securing a leather full-face (gimp) mask and sharply-studded leather gauntlets on him, before introducing a glowing green leech in his ear that not only kills - and then reanimates him - but causes his eyes to glow green as well.

Unless controlled by a powerful, evil sorcerer, a death guard will simply try and batter to death all living beings in his immediate area - and isn't above chasing down any who attempt to flee.

#ENC: 1d4
Size: Man-sized
AC: 6
HD: 3+1
Att: 2 (spiked gloves, 1d4+2)
Saving Throw: 14
Move: 12
Special:
  • Undead Immunities: Immune to sleep, charm, fear and similar spell effects. Will always fight to the death.
  • Mighty Strength: A death guard is capable of smashing down a normal, locked door on a roll of 1-4 on a d6, and may try once a round to do so.
CL/EXP: 5/240

TREASURE TROVE:

Ointment Of Restraint: A blue, glowing liquid that, when poured across the neck of a sleeping or prone victim, will keep them magically pressed down on whatever surface they have their back against for (1d6 x 10) minutes. The ointment somehow affects the localised gravity and short of god-like strength is impossible to break free from for the duration. Luckily, not only is it very rare, but tends to come in small vials that only hold (1d3+1) applications.

5 comments:

  1. Wow, haven't thought about this film in a while. I loved this film. I watched it repeatedly.

    I actually had made AD&D 1e game stats for the fleshy man-bats. I called them Exochymationists, meaning they digest their food externally. Looking back, that was a lousy, far too intellectual name for them. Maybe Skin Birds or Flesh-men would've been better.

    Great films inspire gaming material. This one qualifies for all the reasons you listed and more. Loved

    @

    ReplyDelete
  2. I LOVED this movie as well when I was a kid - far more than Conan etc. I need to track it down again.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I was very pleased to see how well this has stood the test of time.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It was also a favourite of mine in the 80s... I'll have to try and find a copy and watch it again!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure you'll have no problems finding it in some online bargain bin ;-)

      Delete

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